Right with the World
by linnic
Summary: Kate is finally ready to let Castle in.  Into her life and into her therapy session.  How will they deal with the ramifications of her lie?  Each chapter in one character's POV.
1. Chapter 1: Sharing

I've decided to try something a little different. This chapter will be from Rick's POV. I hope you don't find errors in my tenses, I've gone back over it several times, and think I caught them all. I hope you enjoy the story.

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><p><strong>Chapter 1- Sharing<strong>  
><strong> Castle's POV<strong>

The case has just wrapped up and Kate is in one of her quiet reflective moods, one of my favorite moods of hers. These are the times when she lets me in, little by little.

"Hey, why don't we grab lunch at Remy's, my treat?"

"Sure, Castle." She puts on her coat and wraps a scarf around her neck. It will be a short walk but December in New York is cold, and today is no exception.

I can't help but notice the silence that has fallen over us as we walk. So often we can walk in a comfortable silence, but today it just seems tense. I see how she has been chewing her lip a lot today, something she reserves for when her nerves are at their worst. I just don't get the feeling that this is from the case. It was a fairly cut and dry case, well as cut and dry as a murder case can be. I've got to do something to break this silence.

"What a case! I knew the husband did it all along."

"Yeah, suuurrree you did Castle! I seem to recall a certain writer stating that he was absolutely certain that it had been the creepy neighbor."

"Can you really blame me for that? That guy was super creepy!"

"Touché," she replies, lightly bumping into me. For so long, she has avoided any physical contact, but lately she seems to casually touch me off and on throughout the day. Not that I'm complaining, any touch from her is more than welcome.

It sure is busy at Remy's today. That's not too surprising; it is one of the best places in this area to grab a burger. I just hope we can find a decent seat.

After ordering our burgers, Kate rushes ahead toward the dining area, she must see a spot.

"This ok?"

"Yeah, glad you spotted it; this place is a mad house today." We both sit and start to eat and she seems nervous. I have no idea why she would be nervous. We've eaten here more times than I can count. Maybe I'm just over thinking everything. "So, how are you, Kate? I mean, how are you _really_?"

"I'm fine Castle," she says between bites.

"MmmmHmmmm." I give her a look of disbelief; when Kate says she's fine, she's rarely _fine._

"Ok, let's just say I am still working through things, but I'm in a better place than I was." I'll leave it at that for a now. As we continue to eat, I can tell that she is lost in her own world. She is such an enigma.

I continue to watch her as she eats. I know she is lost in "Kateland" because she just reached for a fry, and they are gone. Her mistake brings her back to reality.

"I've been really worried about you Kate." _Since the sniper case_ doesn't need to be said, she knows what I'm talking about. She has been so sullen since that case. She has changed since then, she seems slightly softer around the edges. It just seems like she is holding back from me a little more than normal.

She takes a deep breath and looks at me. Oh those eyes, they tell such a story. She may be a mystery but those eyes often reveal more than she realizes. I love those eyes; I could stare into her eyes all day.

"Castle, I..." She trailed off, clearly wanting to say something but not having the right words. I know how to play this out. Sit, give her time and space, it would come. "Are you busy this afternoon?"

Ok, that was unexpected. "No, not really, just planning to be at the precinct," _with you. _We always let far too much go unsaid.

"I have an appointment in a few minutes, I would...I mean...if you wanted to, I was thinking you could come with me?"

"Sure, what kind of an appointment?" This was odd and new. I don't know that she has ever invited me to an 'appointment' of any kind before. She grabs her coat and stands, ready to leave, so I follow.

"With my therapist."

Oh, yes she told me that she was still doing physical therapy to regain her strength. "Ah, ok."

As we reach the building she starts to open her purse for money. I know she hates when I do this, but oh well. She will have to just get used to it. I cover her hand with my left hand as I dig out my wallet with my right. Then before she can object, I hand the driver the fare. I get a glare, but she doesn't say anything.

As we enter the office, I take notice of the plaque beside the door: _Dr. Carter Burke, PsyD._ This isn't a physical therapist, he's a psychologist. I follow her into the office and sit in the waiting area as she checks in. I can't believe she has asked me to come with her. I'm completely speechless. She is watching me now, those green eyes boring into me, no doubt trying to gage my reaction, but I can't react. My mind is blown with the implications of this. Maybe I should settle down. She probably just wants me to wait for her and do something after.

"Do you still want to stay?" She asks me as she sits across from me.

"If you want me to," _hell yes I want to stay_, is what I would like to say. Things like that only serve to drive her away.

I have got to get a handle on myself. The clock on the wall shows 1:57, so I bet she has a 2:00 appointment. I'm not so sure about this. This seems so...

"Ah, Kate, please, come in." I look up to see what I can only assume is her therapist. I remain rooted to my seat.

"Rick, are you coming?" She's standing there looking at me with curious eyes.

I guess she really does want me to come back with her. Ok, I can do this, just have to be smooth. _Oh my God Kate Beckett has asked me to join her at therapy,_ my mind is screaming at me.

"Dr. Burke, this is Rick Castle. Castle, Dr. Burke." I shake the man's hand.

"Yes, Rick, Kate has mentioned you."

Seriously? Kate has talked about me to her therapist? Well of course she has, I mean we are partners.

Kate walks over and sits down in one of the leather chairs.

"Mr. Castle, please take that chair, I will pull this one over." He said indicating his office chair. "So, Kate, I see you have decided to bring Rick along this week."

"Yeah, I thought maybe it was time." I feel completely lost. It certainly seems as though they are both in the know. She turns to look at me, a slight smile to her face. "Castle, I know you've been wondering why I brought you here." I nod and she continues. "I started seeing Dr. Burke after my shooting, and I've been coming back since. I've really been trying to work through things. Things with my shooting, things with my mom..." she pauses. "Things with you."

"Oh." Really? I'm an idiot! I'm a writer for God's sake and the most I can come up with is 'oh'.

"Do you remember when we sat on the swings and I told you that I needed to bring the wall inside of me down?"

How can I forget that conversation? "Yes, I remember."

"That's what I've been trying to do. I am hoping you could help me with that."

"Of course."

"Rick, I had mentioned to Kate a while back that there would come a time when she ought to invite you to come. Now Kate, what made you decide that today was the right time to invite Rick?"

"I'm not sure, I guess it just felt right."

"Is there something in particular you want to tell him?"

There she goes chewing that lip again. What is eating at her?

"Ok, let's start with this." Dr. Burke must realize that she isn't going to be able to answer the question just yet and he continues. "You guys are partners?"

We both nod in agreement.

"Kate, what does that mean to you, what is a partner? What role does Rick have in your life?"

"It means that he's there for me."  
>"No matter what," I interject.<p>

"He listens. He knows when to push, and when to back off. He's always got my back. Sometimes I think he knows me better than I know myself."

"And Rick? What about you?"

"It means that I have someone to walk beside. Someone to care for, someone to bring coffee to," I see her face light up with a smile. I turn to face her, and while I continue to answer Dr. Burke's question, I want her to see the truth in my eyes. "Kate is the most amazing woman I have ever met and..." Do I say it? "And I can't imagine my life without her." It's not the right time to say it yet, but she knows, she has to know, right?

"Rick, I lied." Did she just call me Rick? She never calls me Rick.

"About what?"

"I do remember, I remember the shooting. I remember every horrific detail, and I remember your words."

Dr. Burke is looking at me, as is Kate. It feels like all of the oxygen has been sucked out of the room. I feel like I have been hit with a sledge hammer. I'm staring at her with so many emotions firing inside. Anger, hurt, love, hate, they are all coursing through my veins. I need to hold it together, but it is taking every ounce of willpower not to break down.

"Why?" It's all I can manage; can she see the unshed tears in my eyes?

"I was scared; I didn't know how to handle it, so instead I avoided it. It has been eating away at me for months. I couldn't say it back, so it was easier to pretend I hadn't heard."

Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, it has. She can't say it back, she doesn't feel it back. Then why in the hell did she bring me here?

"Rick, I...I just..." Her voice trails off.

"Rick?" Dr. Burke asks.

"I don't know what to say, Kate. I watched you die Kate. I stared into your eyes and watched the life drain from them praying to God that you had heard my words. I had wanted to say them so many times, but you were Josh's. But in that moment, what I thought was your final moment, our final moment, I didn't care that you were his."

"Rick, I was never his, do you hear me, never? I know you know that. That night at my place...you were right. You were right about all of it. I do hide in my mother's case, I do hide in relationships with men I don't love, and I'm not happy, but I want to be."

"Kate," the sound of Dr. Burke's voice is startling. I had forgotten he was even there. "What will it take for you to be happy?"

"I don't know exactly. All I know is that I won't be happy without you, Rick."

Am I really hearing all of this? Is this really happening? This is turning into the most emotionally draining hour ever. "You deserve to be happy, Kate."

"Look, I may never find my mother's killer and even if I do, it's not going to resolve things. Like you said, Dr. Burke, I have to make peace with it and I am trying to do just that. I want to be more than who I am, and Rick, I want us to be more than what we are."

I stand, take her hand and pull her into me. I hug her, burying my face into her hair, tears flooding my eyes. We hold each other for what seems like an eternity, yet not nearly long enough. She pulls away.

"I guess I will see you in a week Dr. Burke." She says, clearly intent on leaving, even though our hour isn't up.

"It was nice to meet you Rick. If you would like to start coming together, I think it could help move things along." He says mainly to Kate. She nods her acknowledgement. "One last thing. May I suggest you taking some time to really work through things together? Kate maybe you could even take some time off for a couple of days. I may be overstepping my bounds, but having heard about your partnership, and having witnessed what I saw, you guys really have something, don't put off dealing with this together."

"Thank you Dr. Burke," I say as we leave the office.

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><p>I hope the POV thing worked like I wanted it to. Don't forget to review ;)<p> 


	2. Chapter 2: Making Peace

I hope you are enjoying the story. This chapter is in Kate's POV. Please leave a review telling me what you think.

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><p>Chapter 2: Making Peace<br>Kate's POV

Well, that had taken I a turn I wasn't quite expecting. Maybe I should follow Burke's advice and take a few days off. I can't say I would mind spending some time with Castle, Rick. I need to start calling him Rick. If he's my boyfriend...is he my boyfriend? Ok, so that is clearly one of the things we should hash out. Anyway, I need to start calling him Rick.

"I think he's right, I ought to take some time off." Oh the look on his face is priceless.

"Want to head out to my place in the Hampton's?"

Not a bad idea. At least we wouldn't have to worry about interruptions. "You don't mind?"

"Of course not. We can head there now if you want to."

"I need to go into the precinct and file for the days off. Then I ought to head home to pack a bag. How about you pick me up at my place at 5? Bring the Ferrari." I love driving that car, and he rarely takes it out, this would be a good time for it.

"I'll see you there. And Kate? Please don't spend the next 2 hours over analyzing things. We're in a good place right now."

Damn, he knows me far too well. "I won't, promise."

We head our separate ways, him to his loft, and me to the precinct.

I feel like a high school kid going on their first date. The butterflies in my stomach are ridiculous. I mean, it's Castle, for crying out loud. We've spent hundreds of hours together. Focus Kate, I gotta finish packing; he's going to be here in ten minutes.

I barely finish when I hear the knock on the door. Of course he is right on time. "Hey Rick." Good, I remembered to say Rick.

"Hey, you ready?"

"As I'll ever be." I say with a smile. He grabs my bags and I lock up.

"You know I'm driving, right?" I say as we enter the elevator.

"Says who? It is my car you know."

"Yes, but I want to drive, and we both know you're a sucker when it comes to me getting my way." He chuckles. He looks so different tonight. I'm not sure what it is.

"Are you always going to be the Alpha in our relationship?"

"Do you really have to ask?"

We ride most of the way in casual conversation. As we near his place, Rick starts pointing out various sites and who owns which of the massive homes. He directs me and we finally pull into the drive of his place. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but this is breathtaking.

"Welcome to my home away from home," he says as I park the car in the garage.

He grabs our bags from the back and leads the way inside. The outside may have been breathtaking, but the inside is so far beyond anything I could have imagined. His loft is so industrial, and this is about as far from industrial as possible, with its high ceilings and warm woods. I begin slowly walking around, taking everything in.

"Let me give you a little tour. This, obviously is the kitchen, there is a formal dining room over there. The study is through here."

He has books lining the walls of the study. The woodwork is magnificent with a mahogany desk situated toward one end and two leather couches at the other end. "How old is this home?"

"It actually looks older than it is. I had it built about 10 years ago. Its design though is based on an old Chateaux that I stayed in once during a trip to France."

"It's stunning Cas...Rick." Damn, some habits are hard to break.

"There are 4 bedroom suites upstairs. There is also a sitting room with a balcony. Let me show you the master bedroom."

He opens the double door to the suite and the sight is one out of a movie. A large bed sits across from a massive wood burning fireplace. Across from the door is a set of french doors that open onto a deck. I can also see a staircase along the far wall. "Where does the staircase lead?"

"Go see."

I walk to the staircase, and head up the stairs to find a private sitting room, with a mini kitchen and a private deck. The view is simply amazing.

"I'm going to go start some dinner, make yourself at home, and feel free to wander the house."

I will go out to the kitchen and help him in a little bit, but I'd like to look around a little longer. I need to time to clear my head for the conversation that we will no doubt have tonight.

When I finally make my way to the kitchen, I notice that Rick has lit the fireplace in the living room. He is currently in full chef mode. There is a pot of water boiling on the stove next to a simmering sauce. "Anything I can do to help?"

"I think I've got it under control. I thought I'd go with simple. Spaghetti?"

"Sounds delicious."

"I poured a glass of wine for you, there. It's not the best, but will work. I'm just about done. I just have to drain the pasta and plate it."

I watch as he pours the pasta into a colander, fishes out two plates, and places a pile of spaghetti onto each plate. Then he spoons some sauce over the top. Next he pulls a loaf of garlic bread from the over, slices it, and puts it on the side. I hadn't noticed but he had two places set at the breakfast bar. I grab both of our wine glasses, and round the island, setting one at each place. He is close behind with our plates.

"This looks delicious."

"I hope you enjoy it. How about a toast? To happiness?" He is so incredibly sweet, and when he looks at me with _those_eyes, it melts me.

"To happiness," I reply.

"Kate, why didn't you tell me you had been seeing Dr. Burke?"

And here we go. "I don't know. Like I said he's been help me work through a lot of stuff."

We eat in silence, much like we did at lunch. I know we need to rehash some of this, and I'm ready to, but I just want us to get through dinner first. The day has been tough for both of us. I'm not sure I could have started the conversation in another setting. I needed the physical space that Burke's office had provided.

"I've been so worried about you, especially during the sniper case." He is finished eating, and take my last bite, chewing it slowly as I decide how to put my thoughts into words.

"It was a tough case, it was really, really tough. There were a few times, I wasn't sure I was going to make it through. I had a couple of really severe breakdowns. Javi had some words of wisdom that helped."

"What did he say?"

"He told me to use what has happened to me; to make it strength. He handed me the gun that was used against me. I had given that gun, that gunman, so much power over my life. I saw Dr. Burke two days later and he told me pretty much the same thing. That I needed to make peace with everything, but that I didn't have to let it limit me in the process. I guess it just all hit at the right time."

"Why did you invite me today? Of all the days, why today?"

"I don't know. I'm just so tired Rick. My mom's case has consumed me for so long. It's almost killed me in more ways than one. I don't want to be defined by it any more. I don't want it to get in the way of my happiness. I needed you to see that. I need you to know that I am changing, it's taking time, but slowly, I'm taking my life back. I know you said you will wait, and I believe that you will. But I don't like what I know this has to be doing to you. I see it in your eyes Rick. I see the longing, and the pain; pain that I put there. I want you to see that there really is hope in this."

I stand, taking Rick's hand and move to the couch in the living room. I know that this conversation is going to last a while and we might as well be comfortable. Rick sits down beside me, angled so that we can look into each other's eyes. So much of our communication has always taken place through our eyes. I want to try to put words to everything tonight, but there will no doubt some a point at which only our eyes can truly say what we mean.

"I know there is hope, Kate. I told you I wouldn't push and that I would wait. I mean that."

"There's more to it than just that. Not only do I want you to see this, but I want you with me through this, I want you by my side. I don't want to need anyone Rick, I never have. But I do _need_you."

He takes a deep breath. "What does all of this mean for us Kate? Where do we stand right now?"

Here was the ultimate question. She had been pondering the answer for hours, as she knew it was only a matter of time before it was asked. "You know our relationship has always defied a definition." He nods in agreement. "You mean more to me than anything in my life, anything Rick. I'm walking away from my mom's case and walking to you. How do I put that into words? Do I call you my boyfriend when you are clearly so much more? We aren't lovers, "I see his face fall ever so slightly. "_yet!_" I add. "But even calling you my lover feels like it trivializes things."

"We don't have to label it now, Kate. More than anything, I just want to know that we are ok."

"We are, we are more than ok." He smiles, yet there seems to be a lingering sadness in his eyes. "Rick," my voice is barely a whisper, but in the quiet of the house, I know he hears me. "I love you."

A shock comes over his face in a wave, first of disbelief and then of joy. I lean in to kiss him tenderly on the lips. "I've always loved you." I whisper as our lips crash into a passionate kiss. Three and a half years of build up is culminating in this kiss and I can honestly say that I have never felt more alive. I pull away, there is still some more that needs to be said tonight, but for now, I just want to be held. Rick pulls me closer, bringing his arms around me in a heartfelt embrace. My head rests against his chest, his head against mine. Time passes, slowly or maybe quickly, it really doesn't matter; for time has ceased to exist.

"Kate...Kate, why don't we get you to bed, we can talk more in the morning." At some point I must have dozed off.

"Yeah, we have all the time in the world."

We get up and walk toward the backside of the living room. A decision will need to be made about sleeping arrangements. Will we or won't we share a bed?

"Kate, where do you want to stay tonight? You are more than welcome to stay with me, but if you would prefer your own room..."

I'm not even going to let him finish that statement. "With you Rick. I need to be with you."

"I need you in my arms; I need to know that this is all real." So that is what is bothering him. He thinks that I am going to pull back away from him.

"Rick, this is real, it's always been real, I just haven't been able to admit it."

His smile was enough to melt my heart. He picks up our bags from the hallway, and brings them into the room. Rick went on into the bathroom and came out wearing pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. I had already gotten my tank and shorts out, but hadn't yet changed. There was one more thing that I needed to do tonight.

"Bathroom is all yours."

"Actually, I was hoping I could show you something first?"

"Sure," there was enough innuendo in his voice to make me want to jump him right there. Oh my God, I can't believe that thought even crossed my mind. Who am I kidding, it isn't the first time, and will no doubt be the last that thought has crossed my mind.

"Not that," I say with a gentle slap to his arm. "My scar..."

"Kate, you don't have to..."

"Yes, actually I do. I've spent the day trying to come to terms with so many emotional scars, but I need to come to terms with this one too, and like with the others, I need you." Castle sits beside me on the bed. I slowly lift my shirt and unclasp my bra, letting them both fall to the floor. I reach for Rick's hand and draw it to the wound in the center of my chest. I see him reliving the pain of that day. He gently rubs his thumb back and forth over the scar. Then he must have seen the less obvious scar, the one that runs beneath my right breast, normally conveniently covered by the band of my bra. He begins to trace his fingers over that scar as well. Then his lips meet the flesh of my chest as he places light, emotionally charged kisses over the place where the bullet entered my body. I feel the wetness of tears that have fallen from his eyes. His kisses proceed to cover the line made in order to save my life. I stay still. While the physical scars have healed over, the emotional ones are still very raw, for both of us. We both need to make peace with what the marks symbolize.

"Kate..." He says as he pulls away, his eyes filled with gratitude. "I'm sorry I couldn't..."

"Don't, you know that none of this is your fault."

"Like hell it isn't." The anger in his voice is surprising. "I'm the one who reopened the can of worms. I led you down that road despite your warnings that you would lose yourself again. Everyone wanted me to stop you and I couldn't."

"You are not the one who held that gun. You didn't fire that shot."

"No, but I put you in the crosshairs." I look deep into his eyes. I see the hurt that he has been hiding away, no doubt an effort to protect me. I lean in to brush my lips against his.

"You did no such thing." I slowly slip my tank over my head, and head to the bathroom to change into my shorts and finish readying myself for bed. I want to give him enough time to compose himself.

"Do you have a 'side of the bed'?" He was already in the bed, but had centered himself, ready to move to either side.

"Not really, but if I had to choose, the left." He quickly moved over to the right side, holding the sheets up so that I could crawl in.

This should be awkward; we have never slept together before. Instead, it just feels right. It as though the entire rest of my life has been wrong, and now, everything has righted itself.

"Thank you Kate."

"For what?"

"For letting me in, for loving me enough to let me in."

"I promise, I won't push you away anymore, or at least I will try not to." We are wrapped in one another's arms. My head against his chest.

"I love you, Rick."

"I love you too, Kate." And for the first time since that fateful night so many years ago, all is right with the world.


	3. Chapter 3: New Day

Sorry it took so long for the update. Just a very hectic time of year :) I hope you enjoy the update. I have changed the rating of the story from T to M due to the content of this chapter. I hadn't planned to take the story there, but alas, it went on its own accord. I would love to see some reviews. I think this is the first steamy scene I have written, so I hope I did ok.

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><p>Chapter 3: New Day<p>

Rick's POV

Now this is the way to wake up. Kate is curled on my chest and sound asleep. It's still dark out, so I should try to get back to sleep, but I would much rather just lay here and enjoy the moment.

I start to draw light circles on her back. Just knowing that she is here, in my bed, makes me a happy man. She starts stirring with my touch.

"Rick?" Her voice is so sexy when she is half asleep.

"Sorry I woke you, go back to sleep," I whisper into her hair.

"What time is it?"

"I don't know, but it's still dark."

"Then why are you awake?"

"Just enjoying the moment." I could spend the rest of my life snuggled up to this woman and it wouldn't be enough. She quiets, but I can tell by her breathing that she hasn't gone back to sleep. I keep lazily tracing circles on her back and along her arm.

Now, that feels nice. She's lazily running her fingers along my chest. If she would just...stop it Rick. Don't ruin this moment with those thoughts.

"Kate, this isn't all a dream is it? I mean, everything that happened yesterday, it really did happen right?"

"Yes, it did." She pushes up on her forearm, turning to look into my eyes. "Things are going to be different now, between us." I can tell that she is searching for agreement, still wanting us to put a definition on what we are.

"Only as different as you want them to be. We take this all at your pace. I am by your side, here to support you, here to catch you if you fall."

"What about you Rick, what do you want?" The last time she said these words to me, I blew it. I tried to trivialize my feelings for her; I can't afford to do that any longer. Her eyes are boring into me, a window to her soul.

"I want you in every way a man can want a woman. I don't want to wake up alone again. I don't want to spend a day without you. I want to make love to you, hold you, kiss you, and get lost in you. I want to marry you, make babies with you...I want it all Kate." I see the look of panic in her face. "I want it all, I need it all, but I don't need it all right now. What we have, what we've built in the past three years, what we've gained in the past 24 hours...it's enough. It's enough for now."

A slight smile crosses her lips and she turns, laying her head back on my chest. "No." What? My breath catches, I feel like I have been punched. Have I really misread this whole situation? "It's not enough."

It's my turn to shift positions. I sit up, grabbing her chin to turn her to me. "What do you want, Kate?"

"Everything. I want everything you do." She leans in to kiss me, slowly, lazily, like we have all the time in the world. She deepens this kiss, passion radiating from her body. Her hand is sliding further down my chest. I catch her hand before it trails any lower.

"Kate, are you sure?" The last thing I want her to do is rush and then regret it.

"I've never been more sure."

I release her hand, and stop holding back. I bring my lips back to hers. I kiss her, slowly exploring her mouth. I trail my mouth up along her jaw line, coming to her earlobe and nibbling. She squirms beside me and I can sense the effect it has. I move down her neck, nibbling and sucking gently as I go. My hands slip beneath hem of her tank, my fingers trailing up her stomach to the swell of her breasts. She arches her head back as my finger circles her erect nipple, a slight moan escaping her lips. I slowly, teasingly remove her tank. It had been less than 12 hours since she first removed her top, unveiling herself to me. The sight then had been one of intimacy, but not one of a sexual nature. This morning, I took in her full glory. My lips trail down to her left breast. My lips brush her nipple, my tongue playing a sexual game. She is lost in the sensations. My lips move to her right breast, duplicating the previous movements. My mouth descends lower, leaving a trail of kisses along her stomach. I bring my hands to her hips, tugging at her shorts and panties beneath. I take a moment to fully appreciate the sight before me. She arches toward me clearly irritated at the sudden lack of sensations. My mouth continues its journey; she spreads her legs in invitation. I can tell that she is reeling, probably close to coming. My mouth finds her sweet spot. I gently suck her, my tongue exploring.

I feel her go over the edge. "Riiiccckkkk..." My name, a pleasurable moan on her lips, only serves to excite me further.

Once I feel her body relax, I bring my body beside hers. "I love you, Kate." I say as I kiss her. Her hand begins to explore my body. It takes her no time to remove my shirt, her lips against the hot flesh of my chest. Her hands are already removing my pants. Her mouth trails below, taking me into her mouth. The sensations are completely indescribable. I know full well that I won't last long like this.

"Kate, I can't..." I can't even finish my sentence, but she seems to understand. She moves to straddle me. I enter her, her warm wetness engulfs me. We move in tandem, our movements in sync with one another. As I near the edge of my own climax, I reach between her legs to apply pressure to that spot right...there. In that moment, we are one.

We give everything of ourselves to each other, time standing still. Our lovemaking had been slow and methodical, tender and passionate. We've spent more than an hour loving, kissing, touching, and holding one another. I want her to know the depths of my love and affection.

She lays wrapped in my arms, both of us exhausted. We lie there together in companionable silence, both falling back into a deep and wonderfully happy sleep.

This time, I wake to sunlight streaming in from behind the blinds. I sneak out of bed and out to the kitchen to make coffee. I pour a cup for each of us and head back to see if my sleeping beauty is awake.

"Kate?" I ask softly, kissing her on the check as I do so. I see her eyes flutter open, a smile plastered on her lips. "I brought coffee."

"Mmmm, thanks." She sits up groggily, takes the coffee and brings the mug to her lips.

Over the next two hours, we shower (separately as she had insisted), dressed, and had breakfast. After cleaning up breakfast dishes, I head into the living room to see her relaxed with a magazine in hand.

"May I join you?"

"It's your house, Castle," she says with a definite smirk on her face.

"Can I ask you something?" She nods, not that I was expecting anything else. "Yesterday, you said you were walking away from your mother's case and walking to me. Are you really giving up on her case?"

She sighs. "Castle, everyone associated with her case is dead. If I continue to chase it, it will kill me too. It's only by grace that I'm here as it is. My mom's murder has defined me, driven me in this quest to justice. So much has happened in the past year. Two men that I cared about and adored died this year. In their final days, they were both determined to get me to see the reality of my situation. They wanted me to see that I had to make a choice. I could die in the name of love, or live in the name of love, but I couldn't do both. I've spent 13 years chasing after something that was never really there. Catching my mom's killer isn't going to bring the justice or peace that I am seeking. It isn't going to change the past. The only way to find peace is to accept the past for what it is; a tragedy. I'm not saying I'm there yet, because I'm not. I want to live in the name of love though; in the name of _our_love. I want to find the happiness that I know awaits me in your arms. I don't know what I ever did to deserve you, but I'm not going to continue to deny either of us what we both deserve."

Wow, I never thought I would see the day when Kate brought so much clarity to the situation. So many of her words are echoes from our past conversations.

"You amaze me Kate, you simply amaze me."

"Let's go out for a bit? You can show me around town, buy me things." The tease in her eyes is obvious.

"Did you really just say I could buy you things?"

"I was teasing Castle."

"Oh no, you said it. And I will be holding you to it!"

"Me and my big mouth, always getting in trouble."

"Come on, I know just the places we are going to go. There is this great little boutique that Alexis loves, oh and the shoe store next door will be heaven for you. Then there is the..."

I didn't realize her hand had come up to my chest. "Whoa, there. Let's not go completely overboard. I'd love to look around, but this isn't a shopping spree."

I laugh. "Oh, Detective, you have no idea. Anyway, we can have lunch at this quaint little diner. Then we will have to see where the afternoon leads us."

The Hampton's are quieter this time of year. Summer brings the crowds, but during this time of year, life in the Hampton's slows down. We spend much of the morning at the boutique. She tried on half of the store. She picks out two outfits that she wanted and while she is changing back into her clothes, I have the cashier ring up all of her other favorites, and mine too. To avoid her arguing and because there was such limited space in the car, I ask to have it delivered later this afternoon. We head next door to the shoe store.

"The outfits will be delivered this afternoon."

"You had them deliver two outfits?"

"Welcome to the Hampton's, where it is all about pleasing the customers. Now, before we go in here, don't try to play things down like you did in there. Choosing two outfits, I mean really. I know how much you love shoes. In fact, I'm not sure I've seen you wear the same pair twice, so please, go to town."


	4. Chapter 4: Questions

A/N This one is shorter than past chapters, but I felt like this was the most logical place for the break. I hope you enjoy and please consider sending me a review, they help to determine how much farther I am going to take the story. Well, that and I just like to see what you all are thinking!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I didn't get Castle from Santa for Christmas, so I guess I still don't own anything :)

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><p>Chapter 4- Questions<br>Kate's POV

This has turned out to be such a nice change in routine. Snuggled into Rick last night and waking up to him this morning felt so right. I'm pretty sure I can get used to sleeping with his arms wrapped around me. I've never been one who likes to cuddle much, but I do believe that may change.

Oh, and then there was the rest of the morning. I knew our love making would be amazing, but I had no idea it would be like that. I'm still reeling over the fact that he wants to marry me and have babies. I don't want that now, I still have things to work through, but I do want that someday.

We are walking into the shoe store he had been talking about. I can definitely see why he thought I'd love it; it's a girl's dream. I try on several pairs of heels and boots, it's hard to make a choice.

"Kate, let's just get them all."

He is so incorrigible. I don't need all of these shoes. Truth be told I probably don't need any more shoes. I never should have opened my mouth about him taking me shopping. He is worse than Lanie when it comes to shopping, in fact, if I hadn't been proven so very wrong this morning, I might think he was a girl at heart.

"I can't afford them all and I am not letting you buy me anything else."

"Come on, Kate. Don't go all 'Miss Independent' me. Let me do this for you."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that. Besides, I was totally joking earlier when I said you could buy me stuff. You know I don't want your money. I already let you buy me a couple of outfits, and that was more than enough." I grab my favorite pair of boots and head to the counter. Rick sauntered over a few minutes later.

"Hungry?" I feel his arms encircle my waist from behind. "There's a great little French cafe about two blocks down."

"Sounds great!" I take my bag and we head out of the store and down the block. As we walk, I feel his hand resting at the small of my back. It is actually comforting to maintain that bit of contact.

"Now this place has the best quiche, and their croissant sandwiches are unreal."

We are standing at the counter and I can't decide what to get. Everything looks so good. Finally, I decide to order chicken salad on a croissant.

"Mmmmm, this is delicious!" I say after I take my first bite.

"I told you so!" He gives me a little smirk, knowing how much I hate those four little words.

"How's Alexis's college search going?"

"Well, now that she and Ashley have broken up, she has gone back to square one. She's been considering some art schools. Mostly places that are fairly close, I'm grateful for that. As you know, I wasn't happy about the thought of her being across the country."

"I know you weren't, so I guess it's good she's looking closer to home. I'm sure with her grades and everything she can get into just about anywhere. Has she decided on major yet?" Kate gazed into his baby blues.

"No, not the last time I checked anyway. She has been considering all kinds of things, everything from music to literature, possibly even science or criminal justice."

"I can understand that. I changed majors a few times and couldn't decide what I wanted to be. Had it not been for my mom's murder, I'm not sure what I would have decided. I remember thinking that all my life my parents had always told me that I could be anything I wanted to when I grew up. Somehow that had turned into thinking that I could be everything I wanted to be. It was just so hard to choose."

"I can appreciate that. Maybe that's why I do so much research, it really does let me have a taste of other careers. I just hope she decides on something. I'd hate her to change majors and end up as one of those 'professional students'."

"She will figure it out, give her time, she's not even 18 yet, she has plenty of time." We finish our lunch in a companionable silence. I can tell that Rick is thinking about his little girl.

"We'll have to get dessert. The pastries are to die for." He pipes up when he notices that I have finished my food.

"Let's get them to go, I'm stuffed after that! What is next on the agenda, after the pastries of course?"

"Whatever you'd like to do, but I was thinking about heading back _home_and hanging out there for a while." He probably thinks I didn't notice his use of the word home. I know what he is implying, and I think I will just let it go for now. Sometimes saying nothing is more powerful than any retort could be.

"I was thinking maybe a short walk on the beach would be nice, I know it's pretty cold, but I've always loved how peaceful a walk by the water can be."

His eyes light up and a smirk crosses his lips. "I'm pretty sure I can keep you warm Ms. Beckett."

"I'm sure you can Mr. Castle." I use my sultry voice and his reaction was exactly what I had anticipated.

"I didn't see this when we walked past it the first time and you conveniently forgot to mention that it was here."

"I've never seen it before, it must be new. Let's take a look."

We both go in and look for quite a while. The store has all kinds of books lining the walls from floor to ceiling. It even has one of those little ladders that run along the side to easily access the upper shelves. It's a relatively small shop, but it does have a balcony area that appears to have a seating area. I may head up in a little while if I find something I want to preview. I'm lost in thought when I suddenly feel his arms encircle my waist. I lean back into him and relax into his chest.

"Find anything?"

"A few, but mostly things I already have. I must be in the wrong mood as I can't find anything I want to curl up with."

"Oh really? Nothing in this whole...entire...store?" His lips grace my neck between words and his innuendo isn't lost on me.

"Well, maybe something. What did you find?" I turn, pulling away from him.

"Oh, I found one of these little question books. Alexis always wants to go buy one before a slumber party. She and her friends spend the evening picking numbers and answering questions."

"Sounds fun, but you have two in your hands."

"Well, they are both question books, but this one," he says with a naughty grin and raised eyebrows, "is a bit more...racy."

"Why am I not surprised? I'm ready when you are, I'm just too unsettled today, but would love to come back."

"We can come back anytime you want, Kate. Let me go pay for these and we can head home and take that walk on the beach you wanted to take."

"Ok, pick a number between 1 and 500."

"Are we really going to act like teenage girls at a slumber party?"

"Well, we could always play truth or dare. That would get interesting pretty quickly." I see that gleam in his eye and am pretty sure that playing truth or dare with Richard Castle is something I'm not quite ready for.

"Ok, fine...78."

"Year of your birth. What is your preferred method of relaxation?"

This one's easy. Maybe this won't be so bad after all, at least until we get to the other book anyway. Hopefully if I play along with this he'll eventually put both books away. I make him wait for the answer; take a few more steps along the beach. "A nice glass of red wine, a warm bubble bath, music playing in the background, candles lining the tub, and a good book. That's always what I do when I case has me really stressed."

"So how many times have you read one of my books as you take one of these relaxing baths?"

He is so not getting an answer to that one. If he only knew how many times I have had to buy an extra copy because mine was worn out or had gotten wet. Some things are better left unsaid.

"Not going to tell me, huh? The thought of you wet in..."

"Castle!"

"Right, ok, on to the next one."

"Oh no, you have to answer too."

"Usually my way to relax is writing. Now, it's a double edged sword of course, but it does usually relax me. I don't always work on my novels, sometimes I just write to write, but getting things out on paper is what works best for me."

I grab the book from his hand; he doesn't get all of the fun. "Ok, your turn to choose a number."

"499."

"Why didn't you just go for the very last one and say 500?"

"Where's the fun in that?"

"Have you ever requested a song on the radio?"

"Let's see. Senior year of high school I liked this girl named Melissa Melbourne. I was fairly shy back then, well relatively speaking. I called into the station I knew she listened to and requested Whitesnake's "Is This Love?" The DJ said it was going out to Michelle from Rick. Needless to say I never got a chance to go out with Melissa, but her friend Michelle sure thought I was into her. You?"

"Well, I can't remember ever calling in, but I had one dedicated to me, by my grunge boyfriend."

"Ahhh, finally I get some info on this one." I laugh knowing he has been curious for a while now.

"Anyway, he called in "About a Girl"."

"By Nirvana?"

"That's the one. Not really so romantic, but there you have it. 123." I hand him the book so that he can find the question.

"What do you consider you best physical attribute?"

"My legs."

"I would definitely say I love you legs, but your eyes are my favorite. As for me, I'd have to say...my hair."

I laugh; I really was expecting him to allude to other parts of his body. "As great as your hair is, I would say it's your eyes, hands down. It's getting chilly, let's head back."

"Sure, we can warm up in the hot tub?"


End file.
